Rant 1.1

I was listening to the radio today, and a song was playing, talking about 9/11. It asked the above question, have we forgotten. It got me thinking and here are my thoughts.

The unconscious definition of American freedom has been drastically changed in the mere 232 years of this countries existence. I would argue that we have forgotten, forgotten what true freedom is, what true freedom means.

Freedom, according to the second definition at dictionary.com, is exemption from external control, interference, regulation, etc. A more eloquent definition is freedom is a soul's right to breathe (I cant remember who said this, i think it was jefferson). Sadly, I see neither of these definitions in modern day America, more so than any other country, but still not there. I see it in the old American West, and in the colonies more so than anywhere else in all history.

Modern day freedom is a desire for freedom from pain, freedom from responsibility, freedom from being offended, freedom from want. Americans have lost their dream. One simply has to look at the size of the government over the past 100 years to see this. We, as Americans, have allowed more and more power, and more and more responsibility, to be removed further from our control. We have allowed countless departments, services, and dollars to merge into the federal government. This is an issue to me because the 10th Amendment SPECIFICALLY relegated these items to state control so that the issues at hand could be decided at a more local level, and everyone would have more control over it. We have allowed inefficiency caused by bureaucracy to infect vast tracts of our nation. One cannot argue that the government is more efficient than the free market on virtually any subject. This phenomenon is due to a concept called the invisible hand of economics, which I do not have time to go into here.

Furthermore, the federal government acts like a rather petulant bully over the issues it does not have direct control over. One must only look at speed limit regulations in the state of Montana. For years, the state of Montana had no speed limit outside of major urban regions. They also received no federal funding for the upkeep of these same highways, unlike every other state in the Union. The state of Montana did not do as the federal government asked, so the federal government withheld its money from the state, thereby making those roads less likely to be up kept, making the roads more dangerous for the drivers upon them. Finally, the cost of up keeping its state highway system grew too large, and the state of Montana caved to federal pressure and instituted a speed limit of 75 mph in 1996. They promptly started to receive federal funding.

The majority of this reduction of personal freedom occurred during or after the New Deal. This is plain to anybody with a sense of history and the barest minimum of intelligence. After the New Deal, the Democratic Party started to represent New Deal liberalism, this mentality that people are not able to provide for themselves, so the government should step into that role as provider. The logical end of that thought train is represented in socialism. To bely that fact, the modern day Republican party believes that people are not morally good, and are incapable of making moral choices. Therefore they are stepping in as the role of protector, whose logical conclusion is fascism. Neither of these roles take an optimistic look at people, neither of these roles allows people any freedom at the end of the day. The simple reason why we have fallen to neither of these evils is the democratic process, pitting these evils against each other in a field of combat where, hopefully, those who desire the most freedom for themselves decide the winner. The only flaw in this system is when those who decide the winner, the American people, fall in love with the economic safety nets of one side, or the lack of moral decisions on the other. This has been occurring for at least the past 70 years, and the worst part is that it is the American people's own doing.

Above i mentioned freedom from responsibility. That very concept is oxymoronic. To have freedom is to have choices. To have choices is to have responsibility. Freedom from responsibility is to live like a child, where you have no choices, and your parents, or a nanny state, make every decision for you.\

This note has taken me 2 hours to write. I have chosen my words carefully, and thought things out thoroughly. I write it to get words on a page, hence why nobody is tagged. It is not what i intended to write when i set out, but it is what i was meant to write. I shall leave with a few parting questions. Is it live with risks, with out chance, without failure, or merely existing? Is it deserved if it was handed to you, if you did nothing to earn it? Is it morally righteous to have all your moral decisions made by the government?

More ranting

Seems like i only come here when i need to unload, to mentally crap out. Oh well.

I had a couple interesting conversations last night. I tend to prefer to not mention names, because i know who i am talking about, and i would rather if you all did not. One conversation made me seriously think, to wonder, to question. It made me wonder what had been done to this poor girl to make her so afraid of even asking me my name, my age. The sheer fact that she reached out to me through all of that shows that she has the strength to break through it, and wants to. The sheer fact that she reached out to me makes her worth saving. I just hope i get to talk to her again, because i already care about her, am worried about you.

Another one was someone i used to talk to, yet we fell apart. Its tough, with these girls, some of them truly are women, because i let them dictate and control the conversations. Actually, i force them to, i make them take control of the conversations, of when and how much they talk to me, because i dont see any other way to help them more, to gain their trust as fast as i do,
and not push them beyond their limits. She started talking to me again, because she had forgotten who i was, well, that that screenname was me. She remembered me (im kinda hard to forget...). She just wanted to say hi, and ask who that was, but we ended up having a 2 hour long conversation about her relationship with her bf, about how she had been sexually assaulted, and how she needed to set up boundaries on the relationship, and have better communication with him. She went to bed, but before she did, she said i help her unwind her mental thoughts. So i guess i serve the same purpose to her what this blog does for me, and its something we all need.

A third conversation was an ex telling me she was seeing someone else again. No real surprise because the two have been really close for about 4 months. Im happy for them, and hope it works out through the end because my ex couldnt really handle another bad break...

A fourth conversation was with a friend who i am uncertain of her intentions. Hell im uncertain of my intentions for her. I need to find out more about her, and about me and her. I kinda get the feeling that it would lead me away from God, so i am rather hesitant to pursue anything.

The final conversation worth mentioning was the important one last night. This lady has been a blessing in my life, introducing me to my best friend, showing me that i can competently teach, lead, and listen. Last night, God used me to reinspire her. He used me to speak the Truth she needed to hear. She broke down, admitted that she was weak, that she was scared, and that she felt lost. Nothing else she said could have given me more respect for her. By admitting those things, she showed that she had strength in her, that she had courage, bravery, and that she knew the way, but did not want to travel it alone. I want to show her this side of her. This side I see. She doesnt have to be alone if she doesnt want to, all she needs to do is cry out. She did that last night, and it scared her, so she ran away. (Un)fortunately for her, im a persistent bastard. I simply want to see the best in her come out, to shine through the insecurity, the meekness. I know she has it in her, she just needs a little shove. And hopefully she wont be afraid to shove me as well.

So thats a brief update upon my life, in a rather whirlwindish fashion.